Saturday, February 4, 2012

an analogy too far

we've been getting a lot of flak for forming the facebook group 'post trans normality'.

why did we form it? becasue we, as TS women, were fed up being bunched together with male crossdressers in our support groups. we wanted a space that was our own, where we wouldn't have to deal with sexual predation by males, where we would be free to express ourselves as women without having to constantly defend or define what being a woman is.

but people are not happy:

its a bit bonkers, if you ask me. the writer (and director of the transgender foundation america?) changes the word transgender to human and then says we don't want to be called human. well fine. if transgender includes cis women, then i'm happy with the term. unfortunately, it does not. it includes sexually fetishistic males and the genderqueer. it specifically does not include cis women. Or are you saying that cis-women are not human, Cristan?

What is the problem with TS having a support group just for them? where is the threat to others? what do people think we are going to do, spend our time plotting against the TG community? it is nonsense and very very arrogant of the TG borg to wish to own everything. i could go as far as say it is a very MALE ownership issue, but that would be being a bitch.

we are ENTITLED to our own space. a SAFE space where we are not attacked, shocked, challenged, hit upon or defamed. we are ENTITLED to a space where we can be ourselves without being called elitist or separatist. (although i am more inclined to separatism, the more i am attacked). let's call it. i was not a separatist, and then i met the TG 'community', where male crossdressers attempted to beat me up with words (a fail, since i have sophisticated language skills), then with science (another fail, as i am a published researcher) and finally with pseudo PC bullshit. i still do not understand their need to prove to me that i am 'the same' as them, or that they are just as much a woman as me. I challenge you, guys. prove it. go get surgery, irreversibly choose your gender, or shut up. Accept your own truth. you don't acknowledge the gender binary, so stop trying to possess the binary terms. if there ain't no such thing as a woman, then you ain't no such thing as one...

it is sick, the need to claim ownership of 'transsexual woman' as an identity, when denying the gender binary in the first place. it shows a deep psychological imbalance. based on fear? on jealousy? who knows, and who knows why anyone woud think being driven to the need to surgery that can only ever make you a poor copy of a female form is in anyway 'superior' or 'elite'. it SUCKS but we try and make the best of it.

and that is why we need our own space. a space where we can talk about our fears, without arming a relentless enemy. a space where we can discuss issues with our hormones, or surgery, without being attacked for needing them. a space where we can discover our unique voice and learn to speak loudly and clearly.

for me, this is about us, about my fellow TS women, and our journey for acceptance in society as women. not as trans women. that is NOT the dream i had at 4. as women.

For me it is also, and equally as importantly, about developing a clear voice so that we can talk to governments and health systems and get early intervention for other true transsexuals, so they do not need to go through the horrors of puberty and the ravages of testosterone. We need to do the work to make our future sister's lives as beautiful, accepting and easy as they can be.


  1. Yah, I got down to the part where you pretend that I have a problem with having a TS-only group.

    Hell, I'm a member of a post-SRS MTF transsexual group... and yet I'm not a Separatist running around claiming to be a victim of a the fact that the English language uses taxonomies.

  2. so you read the first paragraph. and that informed you to make that call about claiming to be victims. sweet. i understand that you don't actually give a damn about other people, but are happy to sit with your projections. enjoy that.

    1. Since you're a researcher, I'm sure you understand the need to provide evidence to back up your assertions... which is why I find your post dishonest.

      You claim that you're taking flack from me "for forming the facebook group 'post trans normality'." But that's not it at all, is it? Paste into a reply wherein I claim that you should not form a FB group or even meet in person. Can't do it, can ya?

      What you've done is create a strawman argument. Sure it's easy to claim to be a victim of those who want to stop you from freely gathering. The only problem is that I've not done that once. In other words, you're misrepresenting facts and pretending to be a victim.

      Then, in the comment section, you go on to pretend that you've not proclaimed a pseudo-victim status. The following are unsupported assertions of victimization:

      "i was not a separatist, and then i met the TG 'community', where male crossdressers attempted to beat me up with words (a fail, since i have sophisticated language skills), then with science (another fail, as i am a published researcher) and finally with pseudo PC bullshit."

      "it is sick, the need to claim ownership of 'transsexual woman' as an identity, when denying the gender binary in the first place"

      Yes, being part of a diverse community means that you'll have your assertions questioned - because that's what happens in a healthy community and when it happens that doesn't make you a victim. If your TS group ever manages to reach just 50 or so people who meet face-to-face on anything like a regular basis, you'll find that your assertions will continue to be challenged and that you'll have personality clashes... and that won't make you a victim either. Conflict is part of healthy group dynamics.

      The larger the group, the more likely it is that you'll be "beat up with words" (ie, have robust debates). If you're a good leader, you won't make criticism - even harsh criticism - personal even when the other party tries to make it so. You'll stick to arguing the facts you have objective evidence to support.

      As I've sad to you numerous times, I totally get wanting to have a TS-only group. I've also said that I too am a member of a TS-only group too. The difference is that we don't go around pretending to be victims of those mean ol' crossdressers who are tying to appropriate our identities *rolls eyes*

      So to be very clear, I never said that you should not have a support group. In fact, I've said the opposite numerous times. What I did do was poke fun at the idea that English language taxonomies are somehow oppressive. I also poked fun at the hubris so many Separatists display. For example:

      "For me it is also, and equally as importantly, about developing a clear voice so that we can talk to governments and health systems and get early intervention for other true transsexuals, so they do not need to go through the horrors of puberty and the ravages of testosterone."

      Yes, this is a great goal. Very admirable. However, believing that you can be politically powerful with a group of > 20 is hubris. If you want to make real change, learn to work with people who are different than you, who you disagree with and who you might not even like because the lives that hang in the balance are worth more than your personal discomfort or need to have others tell you that you're opinions are valid.

      Hence, my graphic comparing groups and how they think work gets done.

  3. On a side note, I just don't get why Sepritists like the Benjamin Scale "True Transsexual" designation so much. The "True Transsexual" of the Benjamin Scale is a man/eunuch. Here's what Benjamin said about the "True Transsexual" who has had SRS:

    "(SRS) does not change you into a woman. Your inborn (genetic) sex will remain male. If the surgeon castrates you as part of the operation, you would be, technically and from a glandular point of view, neither male nor female. You would be a 'neuter.'"

    Using that scale to identify yourself exactly equals announcing to the world that you're not a woman. I don't agree with Benjamin's assessment of a True Transsexual (although apparently you do). MTF transsexuals are women.

    (If you'd like to see a scan of Benjamin's statement, I'll post it into a reply. I didn't want to add links to this reply because I'm not sure how it works on blogspot, but with WP, links can get your post sent to spam.)

    1. "A great deal has yet to be learned about the genetic sex and until more is known, it may be well to keep an open mind as to the possible causes of some mental abnormalities and sex deviations. At present, they are mostly ascribed to psychological conditioning; but they may yet find an additional explanation in some still obscure genetic fault, perhaps as a predisposing factor for later environmental influences."

      "True transsexuals feel that they belong to the other sex, they want to be and function as members of the opposite sex, not only to appear as such. For them, their sex organs, the primary (testes) as well as the secondary (penis and others) are disgusting deformities that must be changed by the surgeon’s knife. This attitude appears to be the chief differential diagnostic point between the two syndromes (sets of symptoms) - that is, those of transvestism and transsexualism."

      Harry Benjamin, The Transsexual Phenomenon (1966)

      He does talk about chromosomal sex as the first line of identification, but we know today that it is not chromosomes which are integral to sexing but rather genes. XY females and XX males happen, and they ruin a strict chromosomal binary. He also had gender confused as brain sex, much like many transgender representatives do today. Though to be fair to him, it was due to a lack of evidence for brain sex that would come later, and not the intellectual dishonesty of the latter group. You'd figure people would get with the science of the times forty-six years later, but it seems transgender representatives would rather we never left the 'Virginia Prince' era of the 60's and 70's.

    2. well, you certainly know a lot about straw men. very adept in wielding them yourself, wouldn't you say?
      i said 'taking flak'. if you don't consider your posts and references flak then we have wildly different understanding of what name calling and trolling means.
      i did indeed distance myself from your (straw man) 'victim' line, and nothing you've posted shows me claiming a victim status. lots of words, no evidence. i said 'attempted to beat me up'. not succeeded.
      your argument about taxonomy is facile, and you know it. this has nothing to do with that. if you want to go play with guys, go for it, but don't you dare tell us that we can't have an identity of our own.
      your rhetoric about numbers is sad. i do not care how many people we have in our group, only that the space we provide is supportive. there may be conflict, but i expect them to be resolved without the need for name calling, accusations and flaming. we are not boys fighting in a playpen, we are adult women.
      the reason why i use the HBS term 'true transsexual' is because it specifies the desire for surgery. the rest of it i don't care a fig about. (i recognise that i am a surgical approximation of a female, with male DNA. i can't carry children and my skeleton is male phenotype. it will have to do. what else is there? HB is correct in his scientific assessment. that does not change how i feel about myself).
      when you have straight men claiming they are TS because the TG borg has become so bloated with nonsense, then we need some way of drawing a line. the tTS definition is it. put simply "do you WANT to be physically female?". i've read your quote before, and it struck me as small minded sniping first time you posted it. what do you hope to achieve with it? are you trying to hurt someone? are you trying to start a fight? what is the purpose? have you tried to understand why a group of people say what they say? or are you simply battling? Many TS that i know feel besieged ... the retreat to the safety of medical terminology shows the extent of the battering they are getting. We are trying to say "i am a woman, i am not an extreme male crossdresser so stop saying that i am, please". unfortunately, not all of us are as articulate as i am. on the whole, though, i've not read much that, if read without emotional overlay, is anything other than clear and respectful.
      have you sat down and looked at why you have such overt hostility towards 'separatist' TS? not once have i put anyone down, belittled anyone or trivialised anyone. you have. a lot. this implies you are not happy with yourself - since attacking, mocking and rejecting others is what happens when you haven't come to accept yourself. is it a fear thing?
      we have just started. our voice is going to be clear. mine already is. i can say: "i am TS. this is what i needed when i was young. this is what i'd like to make sure other TS have access to when they are young'. if i'm asked about TG issues, i can say "i cannot comment. I don't understand what is going on for them, so you'd be better off talking to them".
      i pray the day comes when the same respect is given to us by the men, transwomen and genderqueer of the TG groups. judging by the nature of your posts, and the posts of the many TG bloggers like you, its a distant day. First, a lot of people need to face up to and deal with their issues about TS. it would be nice to be able to stop wearing them.

  4. you certainly held up your end . I congratulate you . Keep up the good work. I really am impressed good a TS blog as any other I have read


please be nice.