Saturday, February 4, 2012

an analogy too far

we've been getting a lot of flak for forming the facebook group 'post trans normality'.

why did we form it? becasue we, as TS women, were fed up being bunched together with male crossdressers in our support groups. we wanted a space that was our own, where we wouldn't have to deal with sexual predation by males, where we would be free to express ourselves as women without having to constantly defend or define what being a woman is.

but people are not happy:

its a bit bonkers, if you ask me. the writer (and director of the transgender foundation america?) changes the word transgender to human and then says we don't want to be called human. well fine. if transgender includes cis women, then i'm happy with the term. unfortunately, it does not. it includes sexually fetishistic males and the genderqueer. it specifically does not include cis women. Or are you saying that cis-women are not human, Cristan?

What is the problem with TS having a support group just for them? where is the threat to others? what do people think we are going to do, spend our time plotting against the TG community? it is nonsense and very very arrogant of the TG borg to wish to own everything. i could go as far as say it is a very MALE ownership issue, but that would be being a bitch.

we are ENTITLED to our own space. a SAFE space where we are not attacked, shocked, challenged, hit upon or defamed. we are ENTITLED to a space where we can be ourselves without being called elitist or separatist. (although i am more inclined to separatism, the more i am attacked). let's call it. i was not a separatist, and then i met the TG 'community', where male crossdressers attempted to beat me up with words (a fail, since i have sophisticated language skills), then with science (another fail, as i am a published researcher) and finally with pseudo PC bullshit. i still do not understand their need to prove to me that i am 'the same' as them, or that they are just as much a woman as me. I challenge you, guys. prove it. go get surgery, irreversibly choose your gender, or shut up. Accept your own truth. you don't acknowledge the gender binary, so stop trying to possess the binary terms. if there ain't no such thing as a woman, then you ain't no such thing as one...

it is sick, the need to claim ownership of 'transsexual woman' as an identity, when denying the gender binary in the first place. it shows a deep psychological imbalance. based on fear? on jealousy? who knows, and who knows why anyone woud think being driven to the need to surgery that can only ever make you a poor copy of a female form is in anyway 'superior' or 'elite'. it SUCKS but we try and make the best of it.

and that is why we need our own space. a space where we can talk about our fears, without arming a relentless enemy. a space where we can discuss issues with our hormones, or surgery, without being attacked for needing them. a space where we can discover our unique voice and learn to speak loudly and clearly.

for me, this is about us, about my fellow TS women, and our journey for acceptance in society as women. not as trans women. that is NOT the dream i had at 4. as women.

For me it is also, and equally as importantly, about developing a clear voice so that we can talk to governments and health systems and get early intervention for other true transsexuals, so they do not need to go through the horrors of puberty and the ravages of testosterone. We need to do the work to make our future sister's lives as beautiful, accepting and easy as they can be.